Monday, June 22, 2009

Not Any More He Doesn't

Recently Hubby and I were watching The Amazing Race, and I mentioned how that would be the only reality show I would ever consider doing. You essentially have a trip around the world paid for, and, if you do it right, you could win one million dollars just for traveling. A guaranteed travel opportunity and a chance to win one million dollars? Where do I sign up?

But Hubby was all about Fear Factor. Do you remember that show? Contestants were given outrageous challenges, and the one left standing at the end won the monetary prize. Each episode of Fear Factor included at least one challenge where contestants had to eat something disgusting like live spiders or pig's blood or something.

I told Hubby I could never, ever, EVER do that show because of the eating challenges. And then I asked him if he seriously thought he could stomach some of those things. And do you know what my darling husband said to me then?

"Why not? I eat your cooking."


Friday, June 12, 2009

You Can't Take Us Anywhere

Recently Hubby and I attended an event at the college where I did my graduate work. It was the type of event one did not arrive at in jeans. Everyone was dressed in at least business casual attire, and all of the highest ranking facutly members of the department were present. The hall where they had the event was beautifully arranged. All the tables were covered with linen tableclothes and napkins and there was a bottle of red and white wine on each table beautifully highlighted by elegant tea-candle table decorations.

It was to be a 3-course dinner. It began with the salad course. The salads were placed at each place setting before hand, and had fruit and lettuce other than Iceberg. Our table had just finished passing the bread basket and Hubby found an open space on the table on which to put it. We began our meal to the sounds of fine china and silver clinking and academic conversation filling the air.

Our meal continued this way until someone at the next table looked at us and said "FIRE!!!!" It took a minute for us to realize what they were talking about, but as we followed the gaze of the woman yelling "FIRE!!!!" we realized what had happened.

The bread basket, which was elegantly lined with a linen napkin, had been set too close to one of those beautiful tea-candle table decorations, and was now in flames. While I tried to figure out a way to extinguish the flames that would be less of a scene than throwing the table's carafe of water on it, Hubby quietly used his Boy Scout skills to smother the flaming napkin, and then handed over it's charred remains to a member of the wait staff.

So at the fancy-schmancy elegant dinner, it was us that managed to accidentally set fire to something. I'm sure some of my former professors wondered how I ever managed to finish the program.